A
major part of life is communication. We have tons of ways to share
information and more appear all the time. Share your experiences, trials, and
breakthroughs, trying to communicate with your participants. What are
some ways we can try to become more effective at communication?
Keep in
mind your learners and where they are at developmentally compared to
you! Hint: most of us use verbal communication only when
sharing thoughts, directions, feelings, etc broadcast to others. What
are some other ways we could communicate (and maybe more successful at
getting our messages across?)
Today as I went to work with the wonderful individuals at the Wilmington TURN Center, I decided to focus on the way that I can improve my communication skills, especially with the nonverbal individuals. Many of the clients at TURN have little to no speech, and use a variety of other ways to communicate with their peers and staff. Most use gestures, and a few use ASL. Jack was especially adept at using signs to communicate his needs. He told me how much he loved and missed his mom, who was out of town, and how excited he was to ride the train (trax). Many of the clients who have lost hand and finger dexterity could still tap a table to indicate "more" or "yes". Ashy was able to point to her food and tell me which order to feed her in. It was great that she could show her independence and communicate her choices and preferences. One nonverbal young man has developed a code for yes and no: blinking his right eye indicates yes, and blinking his left indicates no. I would like to try to add more signing to the group and teach them signs for more basic skills and needs such as bathroom, water, hungry, more, etc.... These signs would help them communicate their wants and reinforce their independence in choices. Many communicate their feelings and emotions through their faces and body language. Heath is minimally verbal but made it very clear when when Casey was being a bother and invading her space. Ash, on the other hand, would squeal in joy whenever Casey came close, and reached for him when he left the room. Some many of these individuals were able to convey their needs, wants, and feelings in a variety of ways that didn't require words. They were all able to understand verbal communication even though they couldn't respond back in it. I'm glad I had knowledgeable staff there to help me understand the differing modes of communication, and instruct me on what to watch for so I didn't miss the chance to learn from these incredible special needs individuals.
ReplyDeleteWhat a great opportunity you are having working at project TURN. It sounds like you are really working on ways to make your experiences meaningful.
DeleteOne child in the classroom has a behavior disability. He often will not participate and is angered easily. As I have been working with him I see that I cannot give him direct demands. I have to find things that appeal to him and work them into the lesson. We were outside during a science class and the kids were walking like different types of animals. This child refused to act with us. I walked over to him and pointed out a small bird that was sitting on the fence. The bird had a red belly and the child was wearing a red shirt. As we talked about the similarities and how the bird uses his wings to fly the student became interested. I invited him to come join the class and show us how the bird moves. It took a few minutes, but he did rejoin the class. Later, when we were walking back to the classroom, he got distracted by another class that was also outside. I put my hand on his shoulder to urge him forward. He did not get angry or pull away, but continued to walk with me. I think he could tell that I cared about him. As I communicate with students I need to focus on what they need and how I can help them know that I want to help them reach their goals.
ReplyDeleteWhat a great way to get him involved in the class activity. I am happy to know you are working to connect with this students with whom you are working.
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ReplyDeleteFirstly, I agree that communication is the key to success when trying to build a positive working relationship. Heck, I'd say communication is the key to success in building any relationship! I agree with Dr.Williams on that completely. Today, Day 2 I realized that I am much more naturally inclined to work with students that communicated well with me. Today, there were a few kids competing for my attention. The first group was a lot of fun. A boy and a girl played pool with me for nearly 30 minutes. It was incredible how patient they were. The boy was very young and struggled to hit the ball with the pool stick. I modeled several times and gave him hints like "hold your hand still" and "try to hit the top part of the ball instead of the table." He was positive but when he spoke it was only about how he felt and what he was doing. He was overly anxious for his turn and kept trying to change the rules. I suppose that some of this has to do with his age but his lack of interest in the other players was a tad frustrating for myself and the other player. The girl, on the other hand, was well aware of the other players and suggested moves the other players could make. Her interest in what others were doing and her willingness to share made it not only more pleasant for us, but she seemed to enjoy the game even more than the impatient boy. Reflecting on this I realize that the girl was being a teacher. She was attentive to the other players and wanted to help them be successful. She was positive. She always cheered when a goal was made and never seemed discouraged when she fell behind. Her gracious smile, positive attitude and eye contact were an interesting contrast to the boy. I want to be more like the girl. It was a wonderful reminder that gentle positivity can be just as powerful, if not more so, a teacher as negative forcefulness.
ReplyDeleteA breakthrough I had today was when I heard a boy use language that was not only inappropriate, it was downright nasty. I used a firm and direct voice and told him "do not use that language around me." I say it was a breakthrough because my tendency is to say, in the whiny voice I can't seem to grow out of, "please don't do that.." But it was a breakthrough because I was able to be firm and none of the kids said anything bad while I was there. On the other hand, it was a trial because I could have phrased it better. I made it about me when I should have made it about the environment. I could have said "we don't use that language here." I understand where he's coming from and maybe that language is acceptable or even rewarded at home. I just need to learn to state things objectively and not get flushed and emotional when conflicts of that nature arise.
What a great reflection on your experiences. I especially like that you have already considered what you might say in the future. It is always critical to define behaviors by the environment. Also, I am glad you were firm and clear.
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ReplyDeleteToday was my first day volunteering in a special education classroom. It was such a wonderful experience, and truly beneficial to me to see how different types of communication work for different individuals. When I first walked in I greeted the children with a big smile and a wave. I received many great big smiles back. I thought a smile would be the best way to greet the children because I did not know which children may be deaf or hard of hearing so a smile communicates to all.
ReplyDeleteAs the morning continued I was able to get to know the students a little bit better and get to know how to better communicate with each individual. Some of the children use gestures as well as speak. I was told that when I speak I need to be clear and specific as well as speak louder. (I tend to be kind of quite). But the one particular moment that really stood out today was with one young boy who doesn't speak. When I sat down by him, I smiled and gestured hello, and in return I got the biggest smile from him that lit up the whole room. In that brief moment, I realized that communication comes in so many ways, like a great big smile!
Such a great opportunity and a chance to learn the many ways of communicating.
DeleteI attended the play of "Anni of Aquamarine Gables” at the Off Broadway Theater for Hope Kids. I was responsible for giving the families their tickets for the play as they came in and for taking their pictures. This was a great opportunity to meet some new families and to visit with them. There were five families that attended this activity. I didn’t have much of an opportunity to communicate with them since we were watching a play for the majority of the time there, but I was able to converse and visit with them before the play started and right after it ended. One family in particular visited with me for quite some time. They had three children with them. I was able to talk to J, one of their boys who was about four years old for a while. He was quite excited because one of the actors whose picture was on a cardboard standup in the lobby, had his name. He was telling me about Super Heroes he likes. I am kind-of a geek and enjoy Super Heroes as well, so we had a great conversation. He was cute; he even gave me knuckles when he had to leave to go sit in his seat. There were a few children that attended, one in particular, that I wasn’t sure could communicate very well. I smiled and said Hi to this child, and he smiled back, but I don’t think he was able to speak. I felt a bit awkward because I didn’t know how to approach him. I think next time I will watch more closely how he interacts with his family and try to approach it that way. It was a bit crazy when he came in and I was trying to get other families checked in. I wish I would have had the opportunity to visit with him more.
ReplyDeleteWhat a great way to connect to this little boy by talking about superheros. I also think it's a great idea to watch how others interact when meeting someone new to determine how they best communicate.
DeleteDuring my second visit with Youth Impact I spent a majority of my time in the science section. The children were still working on their solar system and were also able to participate in a coloring contest by coloring pages related to space. I had two interactions in which I based my communication methods on how the child wanted to interact. There was a boy who decided to make paper airplanes out of the coloring pages instead of coloring them. The boy and I started to talk after he asked me if he could fly his airplane in the commons area of the building. I asked him his name and he replied with "Batman". Clearly sensing that he only wanted to get a rise out of me I responded by telling him my name was Super Woman. He started to laugh and from there forward that is how we referred to each other.
ReplyDeleteAt the same table while I was speaking with Batman I found a girl sitting by herself working on a word search. After Batman had left I went and ask the girl if I could set next to her. She gave me permission so I sat and started working on my own word search. I did not push for her to talk as I could tell she was very introverted. After some time had passed I asked her if she had found the word mercury. She told me she had not yet found the word. I expressed I was frustrated since I couldn't find the word. It was then lunch time and as "A" stood up to leave I told her I would work on the word search and let her know if I had found the word. I made sure to keep my promise and once she returned I showed her where I had found the word. I was able to have a short conversation with her introducing myself and asking her name.
With both children I allowed the child to control the conversation based on their personalities. I could see that Batman was a outgoing child and that "A" was a introvert. I did not want to bombard "A" with questions and conversation as soon as I sat down as I could tell I needed to slowly build that trust relationship with her. My plan is to continue to work on that trust relationship with "A" throughout the rest of my time at the center.
What a great way to connect with Batman! I think you did a great job connecting with both of these students based on their individual needs- sometimes communicating requires that we wait and watch and see how the individual will approach you and you did exactly that, great work!
Delete-Daniel Newman
ReplyDeleteMost of these kids can work on their books for maybe fifteen minutes until their minds start to wonder. If you looked at these books, you would wonder how they do it for five minutes let alone fifteen. That is when the talking begins. I love talking with these kids. I am having trouble getting them back to work because I want to find out more about them and what they think. Most of these kids have a street dialect. It is not quite proper English. I like to talk with them in proper English and see if they start mimicking me. I will say 'language' when they start cursing and after a couple of times they are usually apologizing when they slip up. I want to show them respect by being interested in what they are saying, not judging them, and only calling them out on inappropriate content when its necessary. My problem is, once I express interest in them, I have opened the door for them to ignore their work and talk to me and everyone else. I will have to find a better balance between work and conversation.
I really like communicating my relaxed state and easy to approach manner by sitting on the desks, sitting with my legs crossed, observing my surroundings, and putting my hands behind my head. I want these kids to be able to look at me and not see a hair of aggression or hostility. I feel like they encounter those frequently in their schools and neighborhoods and I do not want them to think that of me. I want to be approachable.
Excellent work Dan. I think it is definitely a 'fine-line' between keeping them engaged in their work, but also connecting with them personally. I think the way you communicated the appropriate use of language was perfect. It communicated that you were listening, but there were still parameters as to what was OK, and what wasn't.
DeleteCommunication is a vital component to developing any relationship. As I entered my second day of volunteering, and first day at this new organization I quickly realized that each student was on a different level developmentally. This is an extended school year (ESY) program, and the students are working to retain as well as develop additional skills. In communicating with the students I found it was sometimes necessary to repeat myself, or to even rephrase what I was saying in a way that made sense to the student. One girl within the classroom displayed some behavioral issues which escalated throughout the morning. Communication was difficult with her because she had a hard time focusing beyond what it was that she wanted. She had brought a cell phone to school, and this was distracting her the most. She was given the choice to put it into her pocket or the teacher would take it. Even though she would put the phone into her pocket, the close proximity of the phone still caused it to be a distraction, and she could not refrain from pulling it out to manipulate the buttons. She became upset at the idea of the teacher having it, and so I told her to come with me and we would put it into her backpack. This solution was more acceptable for the student. Sometimes as educators we need to read what is being said without being spoken. To me, this student was saying I cannot concentrate on my school work with my phone right here in my pocket, but I don’t feel comfortable with the teacher holding it until the end of the day. I suggested the student put it into her backpack, because to a degree this allowed the student to maintain possession/control without the distraction of easy access, or the stress of it being taken away. Once the phone was in her backpack the student was able to forget about it, and continue her work. Despite this small victory the behavior issues continued in other areas. The real challenge was that she was doing everything and anything to avoid completing her assignments. At first I thought the behavior was for attention, but as the day progressed I am thinking it is more task avoidance. I will have to be careful in how I communicate with this child; being clear and direct. If I am not precise in my communication she may use her own interpretations of my directions to avoid the task at hand. The day was fabulous, and I thoroughly enjoyed getting to know these wonderful kids!
ReplyDeleteHeidi, what a great alternative for the phone. It was a nice 'neutral' solution. I like that you are thinking about the function of the student's behavior and that initially you thought it might be attention, but that you are willing to consider avoidance as a possibility also.
DeleteI just got back from my second visit to Youth Impact. I decided to focus on communication since it is the topic of the second blog post. A lot of the kids at Youth Impact don't talk very much. They just play their games and do their own thing. They talk to their peers frequently but not often with the staff or the volunteers. Some of the kids come right up to volunteers when they walk in the door, but others take a little while to get them to open up. Like Katherine discussed in an earlier post, I have had the same issue with girls competing for my attention. Today the two girls that I spent most of my time with last time came up to me but they both wanted to do something different. I talked them into playing soccer together and I would watch them. As they started kicking the ball together and I was "referee" they got lost in the game and totally forgot that I was there. I was so happy to see them become friends and have fun with each other, without fighting over me!
ReplyDeleteSo I left them playing and wanted to focus on an individual who isn't as outgoing as the other kids. I went up to a quite little boy that was sitting in the comfy chairs in the game room. He was wearing a Mario cart jacked so I asked him about it. He started talking all about Lougie, Mario, and his favorite characters. He went on and on and we talked for probably fifteen minutes. All it took was me pointing out something he liked and he became a completely different little boy. He was so cute/sweet and was the complete opposite of who I thought he was (the shy boy in the corner). Through communication we built a relationship and I hope to see him again! So far I have really enjoyed working with the kids at Youth Impact!
I am glad that you were able to help the students work through their differences and actual establish a friendship.
DeleteWhat an excellent way to connect with the boy- you did a great job capitalizing on his interests, which resulted in him immediately connecting to you.
This is KENNEDY HAGGARD. I was signed into my grandpas computer when I wrote this blog post. I didnt realize that it would write his name haha I am not Bob Hardy. Sorry about the confusion!
ReplyDelete-Kennedy Haggard!!!!
Thanks for clarifying!
DeleteI was able to attend an activity with HopeKids where we were at a horse stable. It was interesting to see children interact with the animals. At the stables, they had and area to brush horses, an area where the children could hide the horses, and a "petting zoo" area.
ReplyDeleteI noticed some of the children who were nonvocal really connected with the animals. There was one little girl who seemed indifferent to everyone, but when her parents set her down with a baby pigs the girls eyes sparkled. She just sat there made some little noises and touched the pig's fur. Later on the same girl had an opportunity to ride on one of the horses. While waiting she kept saying a name. I asked her mom about the name, and she told me it was the name of a cartoon horse on TV. When the girl finished her ride, her face immediately changed showing no emotion.
I think for some on the children who didn't speak much, they were able to communicate with the animals on a different level.
In other experiences, I was able to communicated with the children though vocal expression, visual facial expression, and physical demonstration.
What a great opportunity to really see how different children communicate their needs. Clearly that little girl had a connection to that horse and when the ride was over she reverted back into herself. This is the time when we as teachers have to give students multiple opportunities to express who they are and teach them through those connections.
DeleteKiersten Campbell
ReplyDeleteYesterday I had my second visit at youth impact. I spent the day in the arts and crafts room. It was mostly the same kids there as the last time I was there, so that was fun! I remembered most of their names and they were really surprised and thought it was kind of cool because they didn’t remember me. All of the children in there had a very different way of communicating. J was very vocal and talked about everything that came to her mind. She was very open and was not shy to ask to use my things. She wanted my phone to look up things to draw online. J is only 6 and was very familiar with how to use a smart phone. After we had drawn for a while we all started to work on a group project. We were making a stained glass parrot. All of the children were very interested in this! Many on the kids showed interest with just their body, they would stop what they were doing and just stare intently on what was being done. Others verbally asked what they could do to help. There was one child that was very quiet and seemed shy. She would not make eye contact with me, and would not even acknowledge that I was talking to her. This was very challenging for me. I wanted this child to know that she was safe to talk to me, and that I wanted to get to know her. I had asked her a couple questions and talked to her about what I was doing for a while without her saying one word. I looked at the pile of things she was drawing and noticed they all had something to do with Mexico. I then asked her if she had ever been to Mexico, and this made her look up to me with a smile, and enthusiastically say “yes”. We then talked about what she has done in Mexico, and the family she has that lives there. This showed me that before, I was only trying to communicate about things I was interested in, but once I found something she was interested in she opened up to me.
I am glad that you had to 'struggle' a little to figure out how to connect with this student and you did so beautifully! Sometimes it HAS to be on their own terms!
DeleteWhen I think about communication and this volunteering experiences, it is very frustrating. There has been a huge communication barrier between us and the HopeKids director and it causes more headaches and stress than should be when volunteering.
ReplyDeleteOn the other hand, when I am finally at activities, the communication between me and the two children (there are always the same one or two kids there who are siblings) is very good. This last week we had a playdate in the park. We had to communicate to figure out which games we wanted to play, how long we wanted to play the games, and how we could play certain games with the limited supplies we had. By communicating with eachother, we were able to have an effective and engaging day at the park where the time flew by! The fact that at this event there was only two kids, who are siblings, allowed us the chance to get to know them on a more personal level and could discover their interests and hobbies and just be able to talk about different things. I love the chance to participate and volunteer with Hopekids, I just wish the communication between us and the director was better.
I certainly understand your frustration with Hope Kids this summer- I have felt the same way. But, you are so correct in saying that when it comes to the children it completely changes everything and the confusion between the adults tends to disappear.
DeleteI have had a hard time getting the older kids to communicate with me. I feel they are comfortable and trust the staff members they already know. The older kids seem hesitant to respond and interact.
ReplyDeleteThis week I helped at the art table. Some of the kids I recognized from last week. There were a few older girls participating in the activity as well. I tried several times to engage in a conversation but I was not very successful. They acted shy and distant. I backed off and listened to them and smiled.
Through this experience I realize that I need to have patience and take my time. I feel as I continue to volunteer that they will get familiar with me and open up. I want them to feel comfortable.
I have enjoyed my time volunteering and will continue to work on communication and building positive relationships.
Keep in mind that the older kids will not trust as immediately as young children will. They will be apprehensive and this is your opportunity to build relationships with them slowly so that trust can be developed.
DeleteCommunication is very important. This was my second time visiting Youth Impact and immediately I was approached by two girls who said they were sisters. We went to color and everyone started fighting, in a friendly manner, about how they weren’t sisters. After a while one of the girls was hit by another and she started to cry. I took her off to the side and tried to calm her down and the situation. After we talked for a second we went back to the group and everything was fine, like nothing happened. It is very important to use our words, because even though they were just “play fighting” at first it turned into a rough situation. After that, the two girls and I went and played a video game. They were having fun and trying to play the same game with each other on different computers. Even though it didn’t work out, the use of communication allowed them to work together and try to figure out how to connect with each other (I have no clue about video games so I couldn’t really step in and try to help cause I had no idea how to). Later, we went to the park and there was a little boy who really wanted to go to the park but his older sister did not. I told his sister that if she wanted to stay, I would go to the park with him because he really wanted to play baseball. This particular little boy has a hard time speaking sometimes. He has a little lisp and a stutter so at first it was really hard to understand him. It took me a couple tries to understand what his name was when he told me. He was so excited about baseball and told me he went to a Raptors game last year. We went to the park and I watched him play baseball because everyone wanted to bat and I didn’t want to get in the way. He, along with some others, is younger than most and it was hard to keep an order when it was their time to bat. Eventually, it took some time for everyone to talk and ask how many times everyone has gone and trying to let these younger kids get a turn. The kids were all nice to each other and very encouraging to the younger kids even when they got out. It is nice to see how much either verbal communication, like a “Great Job!”, or nonverbal communication, like a thumb’s up or a high five, really encourages and makes these kids feel good. Also, baseball is a sport that involves communication. Don’t throw the bat, catch it, throw it over here, and nice hit are just a couple of things continuously being said. Communication was very important that day. I also learned that being a good listener is essential. Listening to the little boy was very important because when he would tell me stories, it would be hard to understand. I feel it is very important to give your full attention while someone else is talking so you don’t miss anything. This is a way we can be better with our communications skills. Also, repeating things is very important as well. The kids were having a hard time remembering no to chuck the bat when they hit the ball so being consistent is also very important. Without realizing it at first, this blog went great with my day and I have realized how much communication is used in our lives!
ReplyDeleteWhat a great way to identify the presence and importance of communication in all of these instances.
DeleteIt is interesting to see how many different ways individuals can communicate. On my second day at Youth Impact I was more comfortable with the surroundings and I was ready to spend time with the kids. There were several incidents where I could see some failures in communication. One incident occurred as I watching and playing fuse ball with a group of boys. I hadn't been there long when two younger boys began complaining that the older boys were being unfair and had "taken over" the fuse ball table that they had been playing on. The older boys however insisted that the younger boys had been intentionally hitting them with the fuse ball poles and that they had left the table so that is when they took over. Their communication was not effective as they sought to find fault with each other, rather than find away to solve their differences. Eventually the younger boys decided to play another game, but I could tell that they were frustrated and sad. Another communication failure that I noticed occurred while playing pool with a group of kids. There were rotating around and taking turns playing. There began to be a little confusion as to whose turn it was and one of the girls got skipped. Rather than letting the group know that she had been skipped, she just decided she was done and stormed off before I had a chance to help get the situation back under control. I felt bad, because I could tell that she didn't have a lot of friend and was isolating herself more from her peers. Thinking about communication and watching these children, I am seeing areas that I need to adjust some of my communication practices as well. I enjoy being in at Youth Impact. I can see some great thing happening by allowing the youth an opportunity to be "off the street" and receive some wholesome recreational activity as well as making friends that they might not have otherwise.
ReplyDeleteWhat a great opportunity to really understand how communication impacts everything we do.
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